Mistress-Parasite

It's not that I think I'm ugly When I look into a mirror It's when I see the reflection Of a girl who is beyond gorgeous And I get confused Because it's not what I deserve Where the beauty on the outside Doesn't reflect the torment within It's when I feel so falsified Inside of my own skin It' s not that I feel stupid When someone else is better Because it obvious And I know I can't be best It's when other expect so much of me More than I can manage When they place me so high Upon a pedestal That I could only dream to reach It's the fact I feel like a failure When they want much more than myself It's not that I feel lonel

Is it too much to ask To find beauty in the broken Just because they can be fixed Doesn't mean they need to be The bruises and the cuts Worn as battle scars To prove the wearer strong That they survived this far Why in a world Where everyone has their battles And struggles of their own Do we crave perfection In the people that we meet Waning to find that innocence No one seems to have You can't just take a life And wipe the memories clean So don't try and make them better themselves Because you couldn't understand What they've been through Or where they've been Is it really that hard To accept a person they way they are Understand that they'v

If you're anything like me I fear for you The mind you were given A cursed sort of gift Forever ticking away at work A constant stress With abilities that no one understands Ones that you still can only barely comprehend It's a chaotic sort of pattern Your mind is in tune with Everything's confusing and contradicting But you know what you want The only downfall being You can't form it into words You can see the beauty in the darkness So it tends to stick around Fading in and out of its grasp Unable to keep your head above its trembling waters Everything is like a scale Never fully balanced Just tipping back and forth Fore

It's hard to tell what's worse And what hurts the most When a stranger doesn't like you For no reason at all Or when you know That no matter what you do Or how hard you try That your friends only pretend Because they're being nice And feeling sympathetic They only let you in Because they couldn't tell you no

Wait for the nights When I cannot sleep Very early in the morning Come find me After I have wandered outside Into the calm darkness Watching silently As the world changes A different atmosphere That I've subdued myself in If you want to Come sit next to me I always enjoy company And in these moments We can talk Ask me whatever you want Or confess what you've never said before I promise I won't hold back I will not judge you And I will keep silent if you wish But in these few hours Chances are I'm more willing to trust you To open up Because I've probably just cried For an hour before hand Or have been stuck deep in thought And need to vent it

I'm sorry That days are passing I'm sure I've changed a bit It's been a while since we've talked Since you actually cared I somehow screwed everything up Yet in the end You seemed to never really hurt Maybe it didn't affect you As much as you led me to believe For when I tried to reach back We had drifted through different seas I tried and tried So many times But was never good enough Quickly replaced And left in the dirt I wasn't much of a miracle If I didn't last that long Like with everyone else I couldn't be what you had wanted My good is never good enough Who cares that I am human If I couldn't keep you happy So I